Friday, October 31, 2008

What Am I?

Happy Halloween!

People keep asking me what I'm going to dress up as this year. My answer is, "I'm not really sure what I am."

So, without further ado, I am having my first contest on my blog. Y'all get to Name My Costume!

Winner will get all the glory. Guts optional.

Happy Halloween!

This came in my email yesterday, and I wanted to share. :)

With Halloween upon us, it is worthwhile to remember a few simple rules to help keep this season healthy, happy and SAFE!! Please use these helpful hints this and every year.

1. When it appears that you have killed the monster, NEVER check to see if it's really dead.

2. Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.

3. Do not search the basement, especially if the power has gone out.

4. If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they should not know, shoot them immediately. It will save you a lot of grief in the long run. However, it will probably take several rounds to kill them, so be prepared. This also applies to kids who speak with somebody else's voice.

5. When you have the benefit of numbers, NEVER pair off and go alone.

6. As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.

7. Never stand in, on, or above a grave, tomb, or crypt. This would apply to any other house of the dead as well.

8. If you're searching for something which caused a loud noise and find out that it's just the cat, GET THE HECK OUT!

9. If appliances start operating by themselves, do not check for short circuits; just get out.

10. Do not take ANYTHING from the dead.

11. If you find a town that looks deserted, there's probably a good reason for it. Don't stop and look around.

12. Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure you know what you're doing.

13. If you're running from the monster, expect to trip or fall down at least twice, more if you are female. Also note that, despite the fact that you are running and the monster is merely shambling along, it's still moving fast enough to catch up with you.

14. If your companions suddenly begin to exhibit uncharacteristic behavior such as hissing, fascination for blood, glowing eyes, increasing hairiness, and so on, kill them immediately.

15. Stay away from certain geographical locations, some of which are listed here: Amityville, Elm Street, Transylvania, anywhere in Texas where chainsaws are sold, the Bermuda Triangle, or any small town in Maine.

16. If your car runs out of gas at night on a lonely road, do not go to the nearby deserted-looking house to phone for help. If you think that it is strange you ran out of gas because you thought you had most of a tank, shoot yourself instead. You are going to die anyway, and most likely be eaten.

17. Beware of strangers bearing tools. For example: chainsaws, staple guns, hedge trimmers, electric carving knives, combines, lawnmowers, butane torches, soldering irons, band saws, or any devices made from deceased companions.

18. If you find that your house is built upon a cemetery, now is the time to move in with the in-laws. This also applies to houses that had previous inhabitants who went mad or committed suicide or died in some horrible fashion, or had inhabitants who performed satanic practices.

19. Dress appropriately. When investigating a noise downstairs in an old house, women should not wear a flimsy negligee. And be sure to carry a flashlight, not a candle.

20. Do not mention the names of demons around open flames, as these can flare suddenly. Be especially careful of fireplaces in this regard.

21. Do not go looking for witches in the Maryland countryside.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Wait... How Old Am I Again?

When I was a little kid, I always knew how old I was even to the fraction of a year. ("I'm 7 and three-quarters!") And you always wanted to be older than you were, too-- one day past your 9th birthday, and you were almost 10. You couldn't wait until you were 16 and could drive. Then it was on to the Magical Age of 18. And then 21.

Then, inexplicably, sometime in my mid-20's, I realized I was losing touch with my age. People would ask me how old I was, and I'd actually have to think about it. And in my early 30's, I'd even have to resort to subtracting my birth year from the actual year to get it right.

It was about three months ago that it dawned on me that I had been telling everyone, for the past six months or so, that I was 38.

Ok, if I'm going to screw up my age, why did I decide to make myself older? Couldn't I have erred to the younger side of things?

Tomorrow, I will officially be 38. I will have grown into the age I thought I was. :)

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Wordless Wednesday

Happy (almost) Halloween, from Lu!

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Nothing (And Yet Something) To Report

It's been a weird last few days. Lots of things happening in my life (Shandy wants to come home to visit for the first time in almost 2 years!)(Joy!)(Having to think about going to court-- again-- next week)($#@%!)(Kayla got burnt out on soccer, and isn't going to do club ball for awhile)(Mixed emotions)(Sick kids)(Not fun)(New part-time business actually going pretty darn good)(Yay!)(Went to Lana and Nate's wedding reception/Halloween party, which I still need to write about)(Fun time!)(Shandy turned 18!)(Am I old enough to have an 18 year old?)(Even though I'm exercising more than I ever have before in my entire life, I'm gaining weight and have a higher fat percentage)(Life is SO unfair)(Attended the last minute *mandatory* budget meeting at work, where we were assured that All Is Well In Zion)(Liars)(Attended nephew's birthday party and scared the crap out of a bunch of kids with my costume)(Bwahahahaha!).

But nothing really to blog about.

Monday, October 27, 2008

Texting Conversation

The end of a rather amusing text conversation with Kayla:

Me: You know you want my hair products...
Kayla: I dont want to smell old!
Me: Yeah, I smell SO close to death...
Kayla: Nah... You smell just like death!
Me: Yeah yeah yeah...
Kayla: Sucks for you!
Me: But I know that someday you will be as old as me! So there!
Kayla: Never! Plastic surgery will save me!

Saturday, October 25, 2008

So Did The Fat Lady

Yesterday, I posted a family favorite joke. It was such a favorite that Kayla, around age 9, made up one similar. It goes like this:

Person1: Say, "So did the fat lady" after everything I say.
Person1: I went to the fair.
Person2: So did the fat lady.
Person1: I ate a hot dog.
Person2: So did the fat lady.
Person1: I bought a balloon.
Person2: So did the fat lady.
Person1: The balloon popped.
Person2: So did the fat lady.

This never ceases to elicit fits of giggles from the younger crowd. :)

Friday, October 24, 2008

Pea Green Soup

My children love to ask the eternal question, "What's for dinner?" It is followed by a close second, "What's for lunch?" and a distant third, "What's for breakfast?" I'm sure I drove my own mom nutso with these same three questions.

One day many years ago, as I was thinking of what to cook, Shandy asked me, "Mom, what's for dinner?" I off-handedly answered, "Pea Green Soup." This has now become my standard answer to any "What's for (meal)?" questions that head my way.

Now, you're probably wondering where I came up with this retort. (For those of you who have spent many hours on a school playground, you know where I'm headed...) It's from a joke that has been around for years and years and years. It goes like this:

Person 1: Say the words, "Pea Green Soup" after everything I say.
Person 1: What did you have for breakfast?
Person 2: Pea Green Soup.
Person 1: What did you have for lunch?
Person 2: Pea Green Soup.
Person 1: What did you have for dinner?
Person 2: Pea Green Soup.
Person 1: What did you do all night?
Person 2: Pea Green Soup.

One time I really did make split pea and ham soup for dinner. It was rather hilarious trying to convince them that we were REALLY having Pea Green Soup for dinner. :)

I knew I had taught my children well when I came home one day, and asked them, "What should I make for dinner?"

"Pea Green Soup," they answered.

Thursday, October 23, 2008


I did the early voting thing today. It was completely devoid of any of the happier emotions, with one notable exception:

SUPERDELL is running for the Governor of Utah.

His qualifications, according to him, are as follows:

"SUPERDELL is your only choice because YOU didn't file. Huntsman took away your freedoms and raised taxes more than any governor in the history of Utah. Springmeyer has admitted that he doesn't care about the constitution. The definition of the word insane is voting for the same people while expecting change.

There is no question that Dell Schanze is different. There are only 3 people on the ballot and SUPERDELL is the only one that is NOT socialist. If you are unsure then fill your heart with love, completely open your mind and pray to God earnestly. You can't afford to get this wrong and will be held accountable for your choice."

No, I am not making this up.

But I did need a good laugh yesterday, and SUPERDELL came to the rescue!

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Wordless Wednesday

My sweet little nephew, Dean, in the sand at Sand Dune Arch, Arches National Park.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008


People ask me why it is that I live in Utah. Well, there are a lot of reasons-- most of them having to do with family-- but this definitely counts for a LOT of the why I stick around this state:

Sunrise, just outside where I work (greenhouse in the foreground). Gorgeous!

Monday, October 20, 2008

No, I Have Not Dropped Off The Face Of The Earth

I just went AWOL for awhile. :)

Thursday through Sunday, I went here:

And here:

And here:

And here:

And camped with this in my backyard:

I love Arches National Park!

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Wordless Wednesday

My work buddy.

And as an added bonus for today:

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Monday Revisited

I had to scrape the windshield at 6:20am again this morning. Ugh.

Ron came out to put some stuff in the trunk of the car for me before I left this morning, and the hatchback handle broke right off. Ugh.

I double-checked the calendar. It isn't Monday anymore. Unless I'm missing something (likely).

Maybe tomorrow will be a better Tuesday.

Monday, October 13, 2008

It's Official

Winter has arrived. At least, it has arrived According To Suz. Why, you ask? It's because I had to scrape the $@#%! windshield this morning at 6:20am. Ugh.

And then I discovered a very large crack running through my windshield. Ugh.

I just checked... yup, it's a Monday.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Experimenter Update

I got Violet a set of kid-friendly test tubes on Saturday. You would have thought I'd bought her the most amazing, expensive present ever, judging by her reaction. :) She spent HOURS putting all kinds of things in the tubes. She used up all the olive oil I had in the kitchen, just about used up all the food coloring, and had fun dissolving things from Tylenol to Polident in all the tubes.

This morning, she opens the freezer, and pulls out her blue jelly shoes. "Wow! Check it out, mom! They're frozen!"

I told you she has a love affair with the freezer...

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Texting Conversation

Regarding her bus schedule to get home from school:

Kayla: Ugh so ill be waiting a lot i guess?
Me: About a half hour today. And if you miss it, you would wait a half hour for the next one.
Kayla: Lametastic
Kayla: What?
Me: "Lametastic". :)
Kayla: Psh i always use that word! its in my dictionkayla

Friday, October 10, 2008

One Tough Mama

That's me. One tough mama. At least, according to some clowns last night...

Before the soccer game started, we went to this little carnival thing going on outside the stadium. Some clowns on stilts were running a game-- they had one of these thingamajigs where you take a heavy hammer and whack a pad to try to get the bell on top to ring.

I convinced Ron to try it-- he got pretty close to the top.Then I decided to try it.

I remembered the wise words of my father, who taught me how to chop wood as a child. "Put the force into your downswing," he used to tell me, "Wait until your hands are in front of your head." So I did just that. And hit that sucker about 2/3 of the way up.

The clowns started ribbing all the men around the area, because my hit was better than most of the guys who tried. Ha! They kept calling me, "One tough mama!" and urged all the men to come and best my score.

Too funny!

New Stadium

The first game for the Real Salt Lake was played last night in the brand-new Rio Tinto Stadium. Ron and I enjoyed watching it, right there in the stands! It's an incredible stadium-- I don't think there is a bad seat in the house.

It's everything a soccer (football) game should be-- lots of action (including three yellows and one red card!), goals from both teams, and great saves from the keepers. The only thing it didn't have was a win for the RSL. It was a tie, 1-1.

One of my favorite parts of the night? Ten minutes before kickoff, the sprinkers came on. The crowed just roared. Too funny!
We capped the night off with mugs of hot chocolate and cherry pie a-la-mode. Mmmmmmm...

Thursday, October 09, 2008


I am in a grumbly mood today. Last night, Lu went to babysit for the single gentleman down the street (the widower with three little boys). He said he would need her from 4:00-10:00pm. Okay, I thought... 10:00 is a little late for a school night, but it should be ok.

At 10:40, after his not answering Lu's texts and calls, I went over to the house and sent her home to go to bed.

The gentleman shows up at... drumroll, please... 12:30am.

He was a bit surprised to see me in his house. I let him know that Lu cannot be out that late on a school night babysitting, and that she will not be able to sit for him again if he cannot be home at a decent hour.

He was apologetic, and vowed that it would never happen again.

What would you have done in this situation? And should I let her sit for this gentleman again on a school night?

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Wordless Wednesday

Street performers in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

The Experimenter

I have a child who likes to experiment with things. She's been this way since she was born, I think. How does this work? Will it still work if I take it apart? Will it still work if I smash it into pieces? Will it work if I glue it back together?

My experimenter is Violet. Her current favorite thing to do is freeze things. This phase has lasted almost two years now. (In fact she took 3rd place in the school science fair--against middle schoolers-- with her "Gadget Freeze" project, where she froze different items and then tested them to see if they still worked afterwards...) I never know what I will find in the freezer when I open it. So many surprises are encased in ice for my enjoyment: frozen matches, frozen applesauce (she says don't try this-- it's gross), frozen toothpicks, frozen toys, frozen... something...

I remember one day when she was about 5, and we were unloading groceries from the car. I gave her the package of two Costco-sized mustard bottles, and she went in. A couple minutes later, the older girls yell, "Mom! Come quick!" I enter the house to find mustard splattered all over the landing and wall at the bottom of the stairs. Older sisters informed me that they saw her throwing the mustard.

Me: "Honey, why did you throw the mustard down the stairs?"
Violet: "I wanted to see what would happen."
Me: "Well, mustard explodes everywhere when you throw it down the stairs."
Violet: "The first one didn't!"

This morning, I drove to work with little stick magnets stuck to the outside of the car. I have the best hood ornaments EVER.

Monday, October 06, 2008

SOLUTION: Can't Open Attachments in Outlook 2003

  • You have Office/Outlook 2003
  • You have installed the Office 2007 Compatibility pack
  • When you double-click on Office 2007 attachments in Outlook, you receive an error that says, "The system cannot find the file specified"
  • Open Windows Explorer/My Computer
  • Go to Tools, then Folder Options
  • Click on the File Types tab
  • Scroll down to the file type you are having issues with (ex: .xlsx or .docx)
  • Click Change
  • Choose the regular program to open the attachment-- in other words, you want Excel to open a .xlsx, or Word to open .docx, etc. DO NOT CHOOSE THE COMPATIBILITY PACK PROGRAM.
  • Click OK
Now try to open your attachment again. It should (hopefully) work this time!

Saturday, October 04, 2008

Never Boring

Kayla is my child who has always had a very quick wit. She's a funny person, and is definitely a yellow personality. This means that conversations in our home are generally amusing on some level.

For example: "Oh-my-gosh-I-love-Kenna-so-much-and-I-really-have-to-pee!"

Or, the other day when we were all driving in the car, with Kayla at the wheel:

Violet: "Your driving is really good now. You're just like mom!"
Kayla: "Only more sexy!"

Or the morning I was driving her to the bus stop, and passed a sign announcing a Cottage Meeting. She asked what one was, and I started explaining it to her. She interrupted with:

"Oh! I thought you were going to say it was a church kind of meeting. You know, where the ladies would say, 'I think maybe it would be best to have the prayer second instead of first, and it would be a wonderful idea for everyone to bring a treat because everyone likes them, and now let's all go make some casseroles!"

I wish I could put her voice changes/inflections into the written word. It's just too funny. :)

This is the same child, who at age 4, told me, "I have SO many thinks in my head! There must be a googol of them." I love it when her thinks come spilling out her head and right out of her mouth. :)

I've told her that the "mother's curse" applies to her-- I hope she gets her own mini-me so that she, too, can experience how much fun it has been to have a child like her.

Friday, October 03, 2008

Letterbox-- Lehi Sugar Factory

We placed our first letterbox last night at the Lehi Sugar Factory. We did a covert night operation and moved a lot of rocks to cover the hidey-hole. It was fun!

This place has quite a history behind it. To read more, visit here.

I've created a new blog just for my letterboxing clues. Please visit Letterboxing Adventures for fun and excitement. :)

For more information about letterboxing, please visit

Thursday, October 02, 2008

Morning Surprise

As I was taking Kayla to school early this morning, we saw a horse trailer being pulled on the freeway. Not too unusual-- there's a lot of animals in this area still-- but then Kayla says to me, "I don't think that looks like a horse in there. It looks like a camel!"

"Not likely," I replied. "I bet it's a llama."

As I pulled closer to the trailer, we saw this:

Wild, huh? :)

Kayla calls her best friend to tell her about "...the best thing that has happened to me in the morning..." Her friend asks her, "So, is an Indian person driving the truck?" Kayla responds, "Huh? What does that have to do with anything? Indians don't usually have camels." Her friend says, "I mean Indians, like from Iraq or something."

Ahhhhhh...... this is the same girl that thought Mexico was a state, and that Canada was near China or something.

Wednesday, October 01, 2008

Wordless Wednesday

Violet, inside the mine on Sunday.