Microwaves

As I nuked my syrup in the microwave this morning, I took a moment to enjoy the wonderfulness that is instant warm food. Aren't microwaves the best invention? Love the things.

It reminded me of the first microwave my family got when I was about 7. My dad worked in a furniture store, so he was able to get one for less than $1000 when they came out. It was a behemoth of a thing, sitting there resolutely on our countertop.

I was fascinated by it. The food went in cold, and came out (seemingly instantly) hot.

The next day after school, I was hungry. We had some rolls left over from dinner, and I thought it would be really yummy to heat it up in the microwave and put some butter on it and have it melt. Mmmmmm....

I put the roll on a plate, and carefully placed it into the microwave. My 7 year old brain then calculated that it would most likely take 20 minutes to heat up. I set the timer, pushed start, and then went off to play.

After the fire alarm went off, my mom found a black hunk of charcoal in the microwave. Her new toy, not even a full day old yet, now had smoke and burn marks all over the inside.

The amazing thing is that it didn't kill the microwave. Mom had that huge box on our countertop for close to 20 years, permanent burn marks and all.

GreenJello Jiggler Award

I am awarding a GreenJello Jiggler Award today to....

(drumroll, please)

Suldog! His recent post, Take Two, was awesome. Thanks for compiling that for us to enjoy!



GreenJello Jiggler Award Rules:

1. This award can be given to anyone, anytime, as long as their blog post made you laugh out loud so hard that you jiggled!
2. Link to the post that jiggled you so others can share in the jigglement.
3. Please copy these rules when you award it, so jiggly fun can be shared far and wide.

(Okay, so the rules are really lame with the overusage of the word "jiggle". Sue me.)

Wordless Wednesday

Random Tuesday Thoughts

So I'm watching "How It's Made", and they're showing how they manufacture personal aircraft. Job I would not want: test pilot for aforementioned personal aircraft company. Let’s see… airplane parts get made, put together, instruments are tested, and then the final test? Take it in the air to see if it will actually fly. Um… I’ll pass, thanks.

The only good thing about snow is that it makes the mountains breathtakingly beautiful, especially during sunset. I just wish it would stay in the mountains, and not come visit me so regularly on the valley floor.

I’ve never been called to jury duty, even though I’ve been a registered voter since I was 18 years old. I wouldn’t necessarily mind it, but doubt I’d be chosen as a juror. My court experiences over the years have made me a bit more knowledgeable about law than the average juror. They don’t usually like people who are smart about the law.

I received a voice text message on my work phone. It said, “Hey girl, how’s everything going? Sorry it’s late. But I just want you to know that I was thinking of you and I love you. I might be going to jail tomorrow so just know I love you.” The return number was from a different state. I guess there’s no point in calling them… they’re gonna be in jail anyway.

Attention Teens!

Life Through A Younger Set of Eyes

Kids see things from a very simple angle. There's no prejudice, no life experience to weigh them down, and things are pretty black and white.

Out of the blue the other day, Violet asks me, "Can anyone get married in our country?"

I asked for more clarification of her question, and she said, "Well, can people who are both the same sex get married?"

"Only in two states, I believe. Gay marriage rights are much further along in Europe."

"Well, that's stupid. People should be able to marry anyone they love, even if it's the same as them."

This was also the child who wanted to know, "Do we put very sick or hurt old people to sleep, just like we do dogs and cats?"

I explained to her that it was a complicated issue, and gave a little background on Dr. Kevorkian. She responded with, "But if we put animals to sleep because it's the kind thing to do for them, why isn't it the same for humans?"

Just thought I'd share some thought provoking discussion this morning, courtesy of my 11 year old.

Friday Fill-Ins

And...here we go!

1. Give me an inch and I'll take a mile. Or at least, that's what my mom always told me.

2. Whenever I get a pancake at my work cafeteria, it's huge. I mean, it's like a minor loaf of bread or something.

3. I wish I could eat as many giant pancakes as I wanted to, without gaining a pound. (Hey, it said "I wish"!)

4. Blood Orange and Pink Grapefruit gelato was the last thing I ate that was utterly delicious. My first gelato ever! I'm hooked.

5. To live in this world is an amazing and humbling experience.

6. Other than this one, Navel Gazing At Its Finest is the last blog I commented on.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to getting stuff listed on Amazon, tomorrow my plans include going to Yet Another Auction and Sunday, I want to spend time with my family!

SOLUTION: Noreply-Comment@blogger.com

When I got my lovely Blackberry a number of months ago, I started to respond directly to comments via email, instead of in my blog comments. Recently, it has come to my attention that lots of my replies have gone to a comment response stealer, noreply-comment@blogger.com.

If you would like people to be able to email you back after you leave a comment, here's how you change those settings. Well, at least in Blogger. Those of you with WordPress and other non-Googly blogs will have to figure out things on your own. :)

1. Click on the Customize link in the upper right hand corner of your screen.
   
2. Click on the Dashboard link in the upper right hand corner of your screen.
3. Click on Edit Profile, which is on the left hand side of the screen next to your picture.
4. This will take you to the Edit User Profile screen.
   
5. Look in the Privacy section.
6. Check the box that says, "Show my email address".
7. In the Identity section, enter in an email address. (Paranoid users: create a new email address for this, if you want.)
8. Scroll down to the bottom of the screen and click on Save Profile.
   

And there you have it. Interactive comments!

So if you think I've totally been ignoring your comments lately, it's not true... we'll just have to go after that no-good comment stealer noreply-comment@blogger.com. Hrumph.

Wordless Wednesday

Random Tuesday Thoughts

When I was a kid, my mom used to torture me by making me take all kinds of vitamins. I thought she was some kind of weird Health Nutjob. Then I grew up, and now I find myself taking vitamins and the like because it makes me feel better. Now my kids think I'm a weird Health Nutjob.

I really hate that manufacturers don’t have to disclose on the packaging that their product contains sucralose (Splenda). I guess since it’s “modified sugar”, the FDA thinks it’s fine to just list it quietly in the ingredients. I have to very carefully read labels so I can avoid it, since all artificial sweeteners taste horribly bitter to me (and give me headaches).

I had a weird dream that something was attacking me in my sleep, but I used Super Cool Ninja Moves on it, and killed the Mean Thing. But I woke up to smacking poor Ron in his sleep. I think I scared the crap out of him.

And then the next night, I dreamed that we had this sleep-over work party. One of my managers said, “I get to hold Suz tonight,” and proceeded to snuggle up to me when we were going to sleep. Weird.

Last night, we went to my parents’ house to pick up our new dishwasher (stupid old one died)(it was only 7 years old!), as my dad very nicely went and found us the Best Deal yesterday with all the sales (Ron and I both had to work). Ron and I were talking to my mom, and she mentioned that we probably wanted to get going. Ron replies TO MY MOM, and I quote: “Yeah, so Suz and I can get home and have some wild sex.” Are you supposed to say things like that in front of your mother-in-law?

Happy Valentine's Day!

Yesterday at work, I was a witness to the sweetest Valentine present ever-- Jean's sweet husband hired a barbershop quartet to come to her desk and sing some romantic songs to her. I wish I had my camera so I could have taken a video of the event to share with you. It truly was a tear-inducing moment.

For the rest of us, I direct you over to Blogger Dad's. He wins the GreenJello Jiggler Award again for this Valentine's post!

And finally, I leave you with a picture text message I received from Kayla... she had just finished counting all her money before leaving on a clothes shopping spree:



Kayla: Money. . . My one true love!!!! <3

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!

Friday Fill-Ins: The 11 Year Old Edition

And...here we go!

1. It seems like asking you to do your math homework is akin to child torture.

2. Wash your hands for heavens' sake when you're done, please? And did you wipe this time?

3. If I thought you cleaned your room without asking, I'd faint. Right here on the spot!

4. Beautiful blue eyes, charming smile, love and laughter is what I think of most when I think of you.

5. To me, Valentine's Day means you dragging out all the craft items and coming up with an extremely clever Valentine box for school. And then leaving aforementioned craft items scattered all over the kitchen.

6. Knowing you are counting on me gives me strength.

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to listening to you play your piano, tomorrow my plans include giving you your coveted Valentines' candy and Sunday, I want to spend some time with you!

Texting Conversation

Kayla: I think winter is stupid
Me: Move to Arizona. :)
Kayla: No way lol cactises are pokey!
Me: Then you'll have to suffer.
Kayla: Psh ill go to california
Me: Too many people!
Kayla: Thats because its the best weather down there!
Me: Then you get more crime and more pollution because of all the people.
Kayla: Ill move to England
Me: England is rainy and cold. LOL!
Kayla: But at least its pretty! Actually ill go to australia its warm there
Me: Yeah. 115 degrees warm!
Kayla: Perfect!
Me: Too hot!
Kayla: Beaches! Yay!
Me: Deadly stinging jellyfish! Boo!
Kayla: Ill wear shoes lol
Me: In the water? They won't give you any protection against jellyfish. Didn't you learn anything from "Finding Nemo"?

Wordless Wednesday

Random Tuesday Thoughts

For those of you on FaceBook, you probably know about the current obsession going around-- "25 Random Things About Me". I'm posting mine here. :)



1. I still don't know what I want to do when I grow up. Well, besides being a mom (which I always wanted to do). I've been a retail store assistant manager, a bookseller, a custom picture framer, salesperson, inventory specialist, entrepreneur, technical team manager, McDonald's peon... and am currently filling the role of Computer Geek. If I ever went back to school, I'd go to law school.

2. I love to do anything connected with art, and especially photography. But I never took photography in high school. Go figure.

3. I've never been drunk. Never had the desire to, especially after watching everyone else get hammered around me. They all looked idiotic.

4. I taught myself how to read at age 4 by watching "The Electric Company" and "Sesame Street".

5. I was nominated for Homecoming Queen my senior year. But it wasn't because I was popular.

6. I have 7 children: 4 of my own, 3 step. All girls. I had my first daughter when I was 19, and last daughter when I was 26.

7. My favorite foods are fruits and veggies. Really.

8. I want a tattooed ankle bracelet because I *always* break any ankle bracelet I wear. And I lovelovelove ankle bracelets. It's the only jewelry I truly adore wearing.

9. I've lived in 6 different states: Washington, Montana, Nevada, New Mexico, Arizona, Utah. Least favorite: New Mexico and Nevada. Favorite: Arizona and Montana.

10. I am self-taught on computers. It was a hobby that developed into my current career. I pretty much slept through one of my Associate degrees (Networking Administration), and my Bachelor's Degree (Computer Science), but I figured I ought to get that All Important Piece Of Paper.

11. I am a terrible housekeeper. If I were rich enough to afford a maid, she'd be a live-in like Alice was on Brady Bunch.

12. And I hate deciding what to cook for dinner. We have a lot of "fend for yourself" meals at our house.

13. I am fluent in American Sign Language. I was an interpreter during college. Now, it's been so long since I really used it, I suck. Now I'm trying to learn Spanish.

14. I've had 4 surgeries, all done by a neurosurgeon. This means I no longer have the first rib on each side of my ribcage, and that my back is fused at L5-S1 (from which the hardware has now been removed).

15. My favorite vacation is going camping. Really. I love to be out in nature, breathing the fresh air, and enjoying the quiet beauty around me. Other vacations are fun, sure, but they don't give me the total relaxation that camping does.

16. I can cook in a dutch oven over a fire. And it tastes good, too. :)

17. I keep a small toy collection on my bookshelf at work. I have a Bumble, Yakko, Brain, Snoopy, Beaker, a Cootie, Bambi, the Peter Pan Crocodile, Marvin the Martian, Sebastian, Felix the Cat, and Astro Boy (among others).

18. I am a pile organizer. My stuff is always in piles. I know where everything is in my piles. If you move my piles, or if I actually clean and put things away, I can't find anything for days and days.

19. I have (mostly) straight teeth, no braces. People ask me all the time if I had braces as a teen. Nope, just good genetics. Only one of my daughters has inherited this.

20. When I was 15, I ate breakfast with George Takei (Mr. Sulu from Star Trek). He was so nice, and has the FUNNIEST laugh you've ever heard. I impressed my kids with this fact, but told in a different manner... "I ate breakfast with Hiro's father." (from "Heroes")

21. I can speed-read. I could read so fast in 6th grade that the teacher once told me that I was lying (when I reported words read in a timed read), and that I couldn't possibly have read that fast.

22. I could only type 35wpm in high school, but can type about 70wpm now. 10 years ago, I was typing 90+wpm. I give all the credit for my speed increase to AOL Chat Rooms.

23. I wrote my first computer program when I was 11. As a true measure of my geekiness, I taught myself to program from a book that came with my TI-99/4A. I was very bored one summer. And it was a "Star Trek" program. (I'm hopeless, I know.) (But I made it play the "Star Trek" theme!) But it never occurred to me that I could do computer stuff for a living back then.

24. I painted a mural in my high school cafeteria/commons area my senior year. I saw it again 11 years later when I visited the school. I haven't been back for 10 years, so I have no idea if it is still there or not.

25. I'm really good at tongue twisters. My kids are always trying to come up with something that will trip me up, but it's only happened rarely. The favorite one they like me to say? "Jacket Packet". (Say that one 10 times super fast!)

Announcing the First GreenJello Jiggler Award Winners!

I have decided to create a blog award today, in honor of my 200th post. Yep, 200 of these suckers have been inflicted upon you, the unsuspecting public. And because you've managed to stick around this long, you now get to see the creation and debut of Yet Another Blog Award.

Introducing, the GreenJello Jiggler Award!




GreenJello Jiggler Award Rules:

1. This award can be given to anyone, anytime, as long as their blog post made you laugh out loud so hard that you jiggled!
2. Link to the post that jiggled you so others can share in the jigglement.
3. Please copy these rules when you award it, so jiggly fun can be shared far and wide.

(Okay, so the rules are really lame with the overusage of the word "jiggle". Sue me.)

I am now going to award GreenJello Jiggler Awards to five unsuspecting people:

• Joe. You were the first blog the Black Box dropped me at. I landed on this post, and you had me laughing out loud. And then you go get me all jiggled again with your next one. And folks-- be sure to read (and come back to read Joe's responses) in his comment section.
  
• Sue. One of your posts had me laughing so hard I thought I was gonna pee my pants. But you deleted it from your blog! But Google knows where it lurks... Recently, you posted another one that made me laugh out loud. Don't delete this one!
  
• Jen. (I'm sensing a trend here, with these three-letter name people...) While Jen gets me laughing all the time, this particular post was too funny because it really happened to her.
• BloggerDad, this was the first post I ever read from you, and still probably my favorite. :) A recent post of yours, though, had me laughing way hard.
• Keely, as I'm also in the process of trying to lose weight, this post totally made my day.
  

Ok, that's it for the inaugural GreenJello Jiggler Awards! I'll be handing out more in the future, I'm sure. :)

Jigglers, thank you for making my life brighter by sharing your humor with the universe.

And to all my readers and commenters-- thank you for bringing happiness and fun into my world. Love yer guts!

First Piano Recital

Violet has been taking piano lessons for about 9 months. She's doing very well, and recently had her first piano recital. I was so proud of her!

Science Power

Yesterday, I took the three youngest girls to "Science Power" at the local college. It was a demonstration on physics, and they were able to do a lot of fun hands-on experiments. Their favorite, by far, was the Van de Graaff generator.

Texting Conversation

Kayla: The lack of education brings many possibilities to destruction.
Me: Wow. Where did that profound thought come from?
Kayla: Myself :P
Me: Excellent observation. :)
Kayla: Well these guys in the back of the bus were in a heated discussion about the economy and mexican immigration. They knew nothing of both, just that "it was the presidents fault" and "those stupid mexicans have no right to live like we do". If they took the time to learn about it, they would feel much differently. They didnt make me mad or anything, i just felt pity. A life without knowledge is simple but without it you will never see how the world or sense have potential for greatness. All they see is whats right in front of them.
Me: You are one smart chica. :)
Kayla: Lol if teenagers ever thought about this i bet they wouldnt drop out of school.
Me: Another excellent observation! Those who drop out realize later it probably wasn't the best decision. Life is a tough teacher.
Kayla: Some dont even realize that. Like i said, uneducated people only see whats in front of them.
Me: I think it is a shallow life. There's so much more out there.
Kayla: But they would never know they were missing anything. They only see what they want or know to see.
Me: Very true.
Kayla: Oh well to everyone their own.
Me: Do you think they're happy in their ignorance?
Kayla: No one is happy in ignorance. They dont know any better to be happy or miserable. I think they're just content.
Me: Do you think that education and awareness brings more contentment?
Kayla: No. I think awareness of what happiness truly is brings happiness. You can know whats on the other side of the river, but you can choose not to care.

Texting Conversation

Kayla: we need bandaids for the kids bathroom im tired of using yours and especially when i need them and youre asleep or something!
Me: I keep putting some in there. There must be a band-aid black hole in that bathroom!
Kayla: Its called an eleven year old

Wordless Wednesday

Random Tuesday Thoughts

One of my co-workers delivered his granddaughter in the back seat of a car this last weekend. He got to sign the birth certificate, as the one who delivered the baby. The place of birth was put on the certificate at the intersection of two streets. How fun is that?

Apparently, someone got to my blog via Google by using the keywords “wee and poo gay fetish”. I am now operating in ick mode.

The groundhog saw his shadow yesterday. Waaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!


Pre-pregnancy jeans are like virginity. There's no going back.


I like to ponder the weirdness that is being human, like culture, society, civilization, religion, money, relationships, and how we’re not so different from other animals. And I’m one of them.

There’s this quote on my cube wall by Mia Hamm that says, “If you don’t love what you do, you won’t do it with much conviction or passion.” It reminds me that since I really don’t like my job that I need to remember to fake conviction and passion on a regular basis.

I had to tell Ron he’s going to have to put his BowFlex in another spot in the new family room. I’m so clumsy that I’d kill myself every time I would walk past the thing. It’s pretty sad when you have to plan a room around your ability to hurt yourself.

Lu's Room

Since folks seemed to like Lu's room the best, I took a couple more pictures of her decor for you.




Still need to put up blinds and some curtains... but as you can see, Lu is very happy with her new room. :)