Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Health In The Age Of Google

I think that maybe I have pneumonia. At least, my symptoms match the ones I've found on the internet. With so much health information right at my fingertips, it's amazing how many diseases I think I probably have.

I wonder how many people self-diagnose themselves before they set foot in a doctor's office with a ream of printed paper clutched in their hands. The internet is like the ultimate candy store for hypochondriacs-- one stop shopping to match your symptoms against thousands of diseases, all for the taking! You could even be a discriminating hypochondriac, only choosing diseases that fit your lifestyle and needs at the time. Plenty of information to help you decide.

In the meantime, I think I will continue to scare myself to death, thinking of the possibilities of what I might be sick with. When I get freaked out enough, I'll haul my sorry self into the doctor's office and look pitiful. Only then will my worst fears be realized, as I come to know that my internet searches were right. Or maybe not.

Kayla told me the other day she thinks she has diverticulitis. She did an internet search, too.


Casey said...

I have diagnosed myself and my poor kids with umpteen different illnesses. Google is not my friend when it comes to being a hypochondriac!

Joe said...

I'd generally prefer not to know whatever illness I may be carrying. I assume that my immune system will handle 99% of them and I'll give it a stern talking to if it fails on the other 1%.

Moannie said...

As an ex-nurse I have a 99% tally of being right, the other ten percent is when I admit I don't know, so basically I guess that means I have a 100% record.

Mrs. C. said...

You'll know it's time to leave off the internet searches when you've convinced yourself you have testicular cancer, Suz. Now please take yourself to the dr. as soon as you can if you are that sick. We don't want you to be laid up oozing phlegm.

Mrs. C.

Grant said...

Don't rule out the possibility of demonic possession.

Jen - Queen of Poo said...

I've been googling "tonsil stones" I'm convinced Tabitha has one. (No, really.) I love Google. Just don't look at the images. lol

Maternal Mirth said...

It may be a tumor ...

... It's NOT a too-mah!

That's it. That's all I got today. A bad Ah-nold impression...

steenky bee said...

I'm off to look up what your friend has. Is it contagious? Does it have a rash? Also, once I came down with walking pnemonia. Lost 25 lbs. It was awesome....toward the end. The first part, with all the fluid in my lungs and the two days in the hospital? Not so much.

Also, think about ten years ago? If someone told me they were googling themselves, I would have called the authorities.

steenky bee said...

Also? Have you ever been to Freedom Land down by you? We're thinking of going soon.

GreenJello said...

Casey, sometimes Google can give out too much information. :)

When that 1% time happens, Joe, I hope your body listens to you.

And Moannie? It's a good thing you didn't have to have good math grades to become a nurse. ;)

Mrs. C., I have a bad back sprain. It made me nervous because my co-worker came down with pneumonia with the same symptoms I was having (low back pain on one side, shortness of breath, cough, etc.). I won't be oozing on you anytime soon. :)

Grant, I can't find any info on "webmd.com" regarding demonic possession. Now what?

Jen, I don't even want to know what tonsil stones are. Then I might realize that me or the kids have those symptoms.

Mirth, it made me laugh. :)

And Steenky? I'm calling the authorities.

Mrs. C. said...

Hey, if you can't ooze on folks who've known you since pre-puberty days, who can you ooze on? I would be honored.

And I'm glad it's not pneumonia!

On a sadder note, we are no longer the same age. I am OLDER than you as of today. Can't you just hear my joints creaking?

O happy Wednesday (and pass the heating pad...)
Mrs. C.

GreenJello said...

Happy Birthday, Mrs. C.!!! May you eat lots of cake and ice cream and not gain an ounce. :)

I won't ooze on you, but I will share the pain meds... oh, my aching back! (Pass that heating pad over when you're finished, ok?)