Violet: Mom, stop! You're embarrassing me.
Me: It's required of parents to embarrass their children.
Violet: No, it's not.
Me: Yes, it really is. In fact, when you decide to become a parent, you have to take a parent test. One of the last questions is, "Are you willing to embarrass your children?" If you don't answer "yes", then you don't pass the test and you can't have kids.
Violet: (pause) Really???
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